The problem of rape is no less acute in modern society than before. As a result, sociologists and psychologists reflect on violence.
They consider special cases and situations through the prism of which the whole problem is assessed. This is how the rape myths appear. Historical reasons also determine them. In a patriarchal society, people expect the sexes and structure of society to behave accordingly.
The most correct attitude to this problem is its recognition and honest discussion. You cannot pretend that the topic of rape is absent in modern society. It is worth highlighting this problem and dissuading society from the prevailing myths.
Sex is always the basis of rape. Rape should be viewed as a direct life-threatening situation. This is not a unique problem at all. It is worth noting that every eighth woman faces her. The sexual attraction of the object does often become an excuse, but the main motives are still different. The rapist is guided by the desire to feel his power, influence, throw out aggression and prove the ability to control someone else. It is known that most rapists have a regular sexual partner. The pleasure comes from the realization of one's own power, taking out anger. But these feelings are temporary, they pass quickly. This is why the offender starts looking for a new victim.
Men become rapists only because of the provocative behavior of women. According to research, most rapes are planned ahead of time. And the responsibility for this lies entirely with the rapist. And you should not consider the behavior of women as the main reason - both children and men of different ages and types of appearance become victims. The main factor is not the victim's behavior, but the ability to commit violence.
The threat of violence can be reduced by using “right” behavior. It should be understood that rape directly threatens a person's life. Each criminal has his own line of conduct. The best that a victim can do is react to the situation and listen to their survival instincts. There are no clearly defined rules. If the victim survived, then she was already behaving correctly.
It is better for the victim of rape not to remember what happened, but to forget about it as soon as possible. Such advice can be given by those who are interested in their own mental comfort, rather than the feelings of the victim. Any survivor of rape should be able to talk to a professional about it. Practice shows that victims who do not have the opportunity to talk about their negative experiences are much less adaptable to later life. In general, the human psyche is individual, so you shouldn't bother with questions either.
There is no psychological trauma from the rape. Almost all people return to normal life after a year. Rape leads to the fact that the victim begins to better assess their strength. But at the same time, the experience itself is so powerful that it changes the whole life of the victim. Rape destroys the human psyche. It is known that 31% of victims have PTSD. This is a serious psychological disorder that can last a lifetime. One in ten people who have such an experience suffers from PTSD all the time.
Only women are subjected to violence. In one year alone, about 20 thousand cases of sexual violence against men and adolescents aged 12 years and older are officially recorded in prosperous USA. According to other sources, every tenth victim of violence is a man.
Incest is rare in violence. Incest is quite common in any society. It is known that 77% of all rapists are those who choose their own children as victims. True, only 57% are talking about biological parents. In 16% of the rapists have some kind of relationship with the victims, and only in 6% of people do not have anything. And in 95% of cases of incest, the initiative comes from men.
Sexual abuse is rare, as there are no such victims among our friends. Sexual abuse is fairly common. There are victims even among our loved ones, acquaintances or friends. It's just that the victims often prefer not to talk about it, but to quickly forget what happened, erase everything from their memory. But the trauma remains and can manifest itself during a life crisis, or if a person has the opportunity to communicate with someone who understands him, to trust. Sexual assault is not necessarily an incident on the street with a police call and a press story. This can also happen within the family, being hidden from prying eyes.
Women often falsely testify about their rape. The Federal Bureau of Investigation has found that less than 2% of rape allegations are false. This level is quite comparable with other crimes. If the victim knew the abuser, then she usually also tries to keep silent about this.
The rapist is already betrayed by his appearance. Abusers are no different from other people outwardly. They may well be friendly, sociable, and seem harmless. These can be people in relationships, with families and children.
Women subconsciously want to be raped. It's hard to get into a woman's head, but it is clear that no one wants to be raped. Aggressive sex is a fantasy for many, women expect decisive action from partners. But in the case of rape, the victim has no control over the process and cannot stop it at any time. This is the difference between fantasy and cruel reality.
The actions of a husband with his wife are not violence. The idea that a husband cannot rape his own wife is depriving her of the personal security rights that unmarried women have. If a spouse is beaten, then it is highly likely that she is experiencing some form of rape in her marriage. Sometimes men even embark on revenge in the form of violence against ex or separately living wives. The opposite also happens, just few husbands talk about their experiences as a victim.
Only bad women are raped. Rape is a special kind of crime. Only in this case, so close and suspicious attention is paid to the victims. They are even almost forced to make excuses. It is beneficial for society to blame the victims themselves for what happened, calling them "bad." The main reason lies in the sense of self-protection of other people. When we believe the victim is at fault, it makes people feel safe. Everyone thinks that he is not like that, this cannot happen to him. In fact, targets for violence are chosen regardless of their behavior.
Rape occurs at night in unsociable places. Unfortunately, rape can happen anytime, anywhere. The victim may be caught off guard in their own home during daylight hours.
The rapists are usually strangers. There is evidence that 70% of the victims knew their rapists. This can be a relative, a colleague, or a man who has asked for a date.
Only young and attractive women are raped. Rape can happen to anyone, anytime. In this case, age, nationality or social status does not matter. A woman's dress, age and behavior do not determine the victim's choice. As mentioned above, rapists choose the least secure object.
If a man has sexual arousal, he can no longer stop. After the onset of sexual arousal, men can still control themselves. They do not need to necessarily have sexual intercourse and look for an object for this at any cost.
A woman can easily fight off a rapist if she really wants to. A rapist can get his way even without a weapon. He is helped by shock, the effect of surprise, the victim's fear of the threat of harm.
If the victim has no visible injuries, then there is no need to talk about serious violence. Injuries are not the result of severe violence. Victims report that constant intimidation, humiliation, and manipulation are worse tolerated than mere physical injury. Yes, and in violence, the emotional side takes the most important place, the physical side may not be at all.
Rape is not found in decent families, it is inherent in alcoholics, the unemployed and the poor. Some studies do show that violence is more common in low-income families. However, poverty and unemployment alone are not risk factors for violence. Rather, they can be viewed as sources of additional tension to develop survival skills. Abusers can also act sober, treating their victim in the same way as under the influence of alcohol. Other studies have shown that rape occurs in well-to-do families with no drug or alcohol problems. It's just that in such an environment they try not to make personal problems public.
Abusers are mentally ill people who are unable to control their aggressiveness and anger. Mentally healthy, successful and educated men may well become rapists. With strangers, they behave with restraint and respect, in public they show concern for their partner. But in private, such men show violence, considering themselves worthy of dominance and complete control. Criminals can be quite self-controlled and restrain their impulses when necessary.
The violence will stop if the woman leaves her abusive husband. Even if there are several such departures, the violence will not stop. Practice shows that persecution, mainly psychological, but also controlling, physical abuse, continues after the breakdown of the relationship. Sometimes the violence becomes even more frequent and violent.
Rape is committed impromptu. In fact, most of these crimes are pre-planned. Obviously, if a man or woman follows his victim at night or adds some intoxicating substance to the drink, then all this is not accidental. A drunken man can suddenly attack a woman, but before that he purposefully pumped up alcohol in order to reach this stage.
If a preliminary consent was given, then it is no longer possible to say "no". This situation is not a contractual obligation. It is about the human body, of which both mind and will are part. No one else has the right to rule over it. A man should stop if he hears no. Otherwise, violence will occur. Even if a woman lured her partner and behaved defiantly, her outright refusal to have sex should be a stop signal.